Lighter Side Date with Joe

When I spoke to my best friend Jamie about my actions she paused and said, "That was so mature of you." Now I take this as a positive sign because my actions were in relation to a guy. When provoked, I am not as mature around them that I would like. 

Hello, my name is Caroline and I am registered on Match.com. Internet dating is such a odd social taboo to admit. Sure, you can brag about how your picked up a complete stranger in a bar while in a drunken stoop and your friends will commend you. But tell someone that you met someone online and you had a cup of coffee with them and instantly you are dating Charles Manson.

I wasn't dating Charles Manson. I was dating Joe, a sweet, sharp guy from Wisconsin who could pass for Matt Damon's brother. Our first date was in a dive bar and lasted from 10:30pm to 2am with the conversation never ceasing. It was nice. Joe ended it with a hug. Nice. He asked me to call him sometime. A bit odd.. but whatever, woman can ask men out, no biggie. I waited a few days and then asked him out. He jumped at the opportunity and we made plans to meet at the 515, a nice fancy-ish lounge. I got all dressed up nice and was really looking forward to the date. The date was just as nice as the first, it lasted from 9pm to 12 midnight. He was all smiles and telling me how much he enjoyed the place I picked. As we left the lounge, I expected, well... a kiss or something... hell it was at this spot that Daniel grabbed me on our first date and went in for a kiss.. but here was Joe just waving me goodbye and telling me to call him again to hang out. I gave him an odd stare and he gave me a nice friendly hug. I walked to my car, pissed and confused. Was this just a midwest thing, wanting to take it slow and be a gentleman? Why was he asking me to make plans again? 

I spoke to a few friends about it and one girl commented that her husband didn't kiss her for the first two months they were dating. I winced. Great. But all my friends agreed that him asking me to make plans was weird. 

Yesterday I pretty much had my fill. Here was labor day weekend, three days of free time for the both of us and he didn't want to make any plans. I wrote him a polite email saying goodbye, that I think he is great but I prefer to date men who show more initiative. I wasn't sure how he would take it, maybe he was super interested but just shy. Maybe he is just bad at dating and more used to being a boyfriend. His answer... 

"I think I am just not at a point in my life where dating and such things are clear priorities for me. Just trying to have more fun and do whatever strikes me at the moment." There it was my answer. No long drawn out conversations with my girlfriends about, "I wonder what Joe is thinking." I just put my cards on the table and he answered. Joe is thinking fun. Joe just wants to strike his fancy with whatever. I have a lot of guy friends who don't want to date and just want to have fun. It is ok, no harm no foul.. but know what they do? They sit their asses on the couch with a beer in their hand and not spend $$ on a friggin *dating* website!